Alone
by Riza Winters
Summary: Apollo struggles to recover from the death of Baron. He decides to deal with it how he's dealt with everything—alone. But when Toma takes advantage of his pain, it will take all of DEAVA to save him. A short story for a series I was delighted to find on Netflix. If you haven't seen it, check it out. Follows episode 14 (season 2 episode 1). HC and Action.
1. Chapter 1

"...Baron."

The name slipped away with the wind, between trees and was drowned in the rustle of leaves. His hand clenched tighter, nails biting into his palm.

_You're not the only one who's lost someone to the shadow angels._

"SHUT UP!" Apollo clutched his head and screamed at the memory of words. The shout rang out, birds scattered even though darkness was falling. But the pain they heard in his cry bit sharper than any predators of the night.

"I know." He answered no one. "I know everyone's lost but I..." He let his fingers drop from his hair. "I have no one else..."

* * *

"Silvia, come inside."

"Brother...I'm just worried."

"Not about that mongrel."

"Don't call him that!" The blonde girl whirled on her brother, staring up at his ever-calm eyes. "How can you call him names when he saved us from Toma—when he didn't say anything about our—our feathers."

"Silvia, quiet! Besides, he still might."

"He won't. You saw the look in his eyes back there as much as me. He called us his friends." She let a shaky breath escape her. "He pulled it together to save us then. And in the vectors...when he disappeared—"

"What happened to you, Silvia? The way you screamed the name of his friend."

"I felt his pain, brother. And it was so deep, so overwhelming. But even feeling that he fought to save us. But now the battle is over. And he's out there somewhere, hurting." Her eyes were on the woods where Apollo had disappeared immediately after Baron's death. Now, she was sure he had taken refuge there again.

"He lived on the streets for years. He will be safer in those woods than he ever was there." It was a mild comfort, but she took it. Sirius put a hand on her shoulder and guided her back inside. "Come, you should get some rest."

* * *

"Is he going to stay out there all night?" Jun sighed at the window in the boys' dormitory.

"Huh?" Pierre had already started to drift but he brought his head around to look out the dark glass. "Apollo sleeps in other places all the time."

"I heard he ran off this morning, into the woods."

"What? He did? Well I'm sure he'll be alright."

"...yeah."

Pierre tried to roll over and ignore it but he could still feel Jun standing there, staring out the window. He let out a long sigh and sat up.

"What?"

"It's just...did Apollo really talk to anyone about what happened? It was pretty traumatic, even for those of us just watching. I mean, you were merged with him at the time. You must have felt it too."

"Of course I did. But like I told him, everyone's lost someone to the shadow angels."

"Yes, and everyone takes time to get over it. Baron was the only reason Apollo did anything with DEAVA. What if he's gone for good now?"

This got Pierre's attention. "You don't really think he'd leave, do you?"

"I don't know, but I think it's a possibility."

"Great." Pierre rolled out of bed.

"Where are you going?"

"To see what the others think. If there is a chance he's run off, we need to find him. Coming?"

"Right." Jun followed him out the door.

* * *

"What? Apollo wouldn't leave." Silvia reacted to Pierre's words to the assembled element users.

"I don't know, I think Jun has a point." The athlete defended. "But I think we all know we need him now. We should find him before he gets too far."

"What would be the point, of bringing him back, if he does not want to be here?" Sirius asked. "He will never merge with us, if he doesn't want to."

"I don't think that's what's going on here." Tsugumi said nervously. Her eyes met Reika and she continued. "I think he's hurting and he doesn't feel like he can turn to any of us."

"It's really no surprise." Reika added. "After the way we've treated him since he arrived. Of course he doesn't feel like he can show us his real feelings."

"Do you really think, we've been that horrible?" But Silvia asked it like she already knew the answer. She had been there both times Apollo had lost everything—the day they met, and the day Baron died. The first time, they'd imprisoned him and beat him up. And this time, he'd had to pull himself together because of shadow angel attacks. Neither situation had given him a chance to grieve.

"We have to find him." She concluded. "Tsugumi is right."

"I am?"

"Yes. He's out there and he needs to know we're here for him. We're a team, isn't that what Gen Fudo has taught us?"

Everyone consented. They left the warmth of the manor for the dark, cold woods.

* * *

The cold had settled on his bare arms and shins hours ago, but he made no move to warm himself. In fact, he didn't feel like moving at all, ever again. His head rested on his knees, arms wrapped around a mess of hair. His only protection against the night wind was the tree at his back, twice as wide as his small frame.

Animals had passed him by with a sniff or a growl, but none dared near him. There was no mistaking the heartache, the rage and the pain that boiled from him. But now, in the cold, everything was reduced to a simmer—a constant, chest aching pain that left him lifeless and empty.

Baron. The kids.

Their faces swam before him, in that realm that only exists on the cusp of sleep. He wanted to linger there forever, where he could focus just enough to hold an image, and it remained as clear as any vision before his eyes.

But he eventually lost control, fell deeper into slumber and the images morphed, backward through time, memories of hunger and pain and cold.

Like now.

Except there was no hope of Baron appearing, to toss him a loaf of stale bread, to shed a warm smile even if his own stomach ached for hunger.

There was no Baron to come rescue him from this place, from the loneliness of every day among people who thought him less than human, who called him names and despised him. Who had never known the suffering of the camps and took everything they had for granted.

"They're not really that bad, are they?" His head shot up. Baron's voice still echoed in his mind. He looked around the dark for his friend but saw no one, and knew it had only been a trick of his own mind, putting words in a dead man's mouth.

But it did sound like something he'd say.

"You wouldn't have liked Sirius." His voice was soft, he stared straight a head and rested his chin on his crossed arms. "But you probably would have gotten a kick out of Silvia." He tucked his head back into his arms. "They're not all bad, but they're not you. They'll never be anything close to you. But I'll stay with them. I'll do everything I have to to save the little ones. I promise you, Baron."

His voice choked off, he felt the damn breaking. "If only I'd been faster!" His fingers pulled hard on red locks. "If I'd just closed my hands—if I'd run as soon as I had you—" his words broke off, turned into something else, into a primal cry that shook the air, that shook his very soul. And when it died he was left only with the cold, outside and in, and the tears that shook his body, that tore from his throat in agonized sobs.

"Apollo..." He froze at the voice, his sobs ceasing at once. In the calm, he heard more bodies, caught the scent of several people. Slowly he drew reddened eyes from his knees, trying to keep them hard, trying to force a scowl over his face.

"What are you all doing here?" He failed to sound gruff, instead his voice was just hoarse.

"We came to find you." Silvia said softly. Why was she talking like that? She never talked like that.

"Can't you take a hint?" Now when he shot to his feet the anger was real. "I didn't want to be found!"

"You shouldn't be alone right now." Pierre took a step closer.

"But I am alone!" His voice rang out clear in the night. He took a step back from the group. He felt his heart thundering in his chest. "I am alone..." he repeated in a whisper.

"Apol—"

"Stay away from me." He pulled his arm back from where she'd tried to touch him. "I don't want you here. Any of you!"

"It's okay to be upset." Pierre was at Silvia's side.

"I'm not upset. Everyone's lost someone, right?"

"I didn't mean—"

"Of course you did! Why should I have feelings? I'm just Apollo. I'm just the dog, the street kid with no feelings."

"That's not true." Jun said from behind Pierre.

"You're our friend." Tsugumi added.

"We should never have made you feel that way." Reika stood at Sirius's side and looked to him. He gave a long sigh.

"You should come back with us." His voice was flat. Apollo glared at him.

"You're all just worried you'll lose your stupid Apollonius. Well I'm not him! I'm Apollo! Baron gave me that name, it's the only one I want! I don't care what happened 12 000 years ago. I care what happened three days ago." He gave a lurch, he was losing it, a hand shot to his face in a vain attempt to physically hold back the tears and the pain. "JUST GO AWAY!"

"No." Silvia stood firm before him.

"Fine, stay here." He shoved past her but his arm was caught by Pierre. He tried to pull it back but his grip was firm.

"Let go."

"No."

"LET GO!" He swung, wild, unthinking, Pierre caught this wrist as well. He yanked against the hold, but nothing in him was working right. He was shaking from head to toe and he ended up just standing there, arms going limp in Pierre's hold.

"I don't..." he lowered his eyes, stared at the blue uniform before him, muted in the dark. He felt heavy, like everything was slowing down. "I don't want to move on without him." His head fell forward against a strong chest. Pierre let his arms go and braced him.

"I'm sorry that you lost him."

Apollo squeezed his eyes tight, and was barely aware of the shift in bodies until he smelled her, felt her, and instead of a broad chest it was delicate arms wrapping around him. She pressed his face into her shoulder and he clung back to her, desperate for some relief, desperate to find an anchor in the storm of sorrow that consumed him. And he screamed. He sobbed. Until his knees gave out, and he felt his stomach heave, his vision blur, and the darkness win.

* * *

_**So I see this is a pretty small fandom here, but I recently came back to this series and I had this story in mind so I wanted to share if anyone out there still has a soft spot for Aquarion. This will be about 4 or 5 chapters long, tthe first part is more character and HC, the last part is action (and HC). If you stumble upon this, I would like to hear your thoughts,**_

_**Riza.**_


	2. Chapter 2

Tired eyes opened on an unfamiliar room. Sharp, chemical scents bit into his nostrils, he tensed, and felt a pain in his arm.

"Easy, Apollo."

He felt the bed dip with another's weight and the sheets he'd been tangled in were straightened out. Sophia finished by smoothing down his wild locks that were tangled with the sweat of sleep.

"Where am I?"

"I had you brought here, when you didn't wake up."

"What?"

"You've been asleep for two days." His eyes finally focused on her, sitting on the edge of his bed, then trailed to the machine and IV in his arm. "I wanted to monitor you and make sure you were getting fluids," she explained.

"Why was I out for so long?" He sat slowly, feeling the weight of sleep still threatening to drag him back.

"You tell me. Did you sleep at all after Baron died and Toma attacked you?" He shook his head. "And after that, when your vector disappeared in the middle of that battle?"

"I lost consciousness."

"That doesn't count as sleep. You crashed, Apollo, you're body just needed rest."

"Well, am I okay to go now?"

"Only if you promise to eat something, and take care of yourself."

"When have I ever refused food?" But his voice was flat, there was no smile in him. She removed his IV, but her hand lingered on his arm.

"Apollo, you and I once had a talk about kinship."

He stiffened.

"Baron was your family."

He pulled his arm away from her but he didn't get off the bed. "Yes."

"I think you need to talk about this. I would like to listen."

He dropped his head but shook it. "What is there to say?"

"Anything. Everything. Tell me how you feel, what you're thinking?"

"What I feel...there are no words for what I feel." He rubbed a hand over his eyes and slid off the bed. "As for what I'm thinking—that's not for anyone to know but me." He made his way from the clinic, she followed him to the doors.

"I'll be here, Apollo, when you're ready."

He said nothing and left.

* * *

"Geeze, poor kid." Pierre mumbled from the far end of the dormitory. He and Jun had stopped at the entrance when they saw him on his bed, laying on his side, completely limp, yet the quality of his breathing told them he was still awake. "I've never seen him like this—he never slows down. This has really stopped him dead in his tracks."

"Well after the way he broke down in the woods the other night, I'm not surprised. As upset as he is over Baron, he's probably equally confused and frightened by these emotions."

"You think?"

"Apollo thinks he's invincible. Now he knows he's not. He can't fight or escape this, so he doesn't know how to deal with it."

"Geeze, you major in psychology or something?"

"Maybe someday." Jun sighed. "But for now I hope we can figure out how to help him without a psychology degree."

* * *

"I made you a strawberry shake."

Hazel eyes drug up from the floor where they'd settled hours ago. They met her bright blue ones and for a second she felt his despair as deeply as she had in the vector.

"Here." She held up the frothy beverage between them.

"I don't even like those."

"What?" She sat back and glared at him. "But you steal them from me all the time."

"'Cause I was hungry." He shrugged.

"You jerk! Well I went to the trouble of making it for you so now you have to eat it!"

"What? Is that how it works?"

"Yes it is." She took a hold of his shoulder and sat him up. "Now drink it." She pushed it into his hands.

"Silvia..." he stared at the pink substance but didn't make a move to eat it. "You don't have to be so nice to me."

"What? I'm not being nice." She crossed her arms over her chest. "Sophia asked me to make sure you ate something."

"Oh."

Silvia's frame slumped slightly. She sat on the bed next to him. "Actually I asked her if I could do anything."

He tried to smile. He failed.

"You should drink that, it's good for you."

He raised the glass and drank slowly through the straw. He finished it though, and she took the glass back.

"Feel any better?"

"Yeah." His voice was so dead, eyes ever on the ground.

"You're lying." He didn't answer. She sighed. "It's okay. You don't have to feel better right away. No one expects you to."

"But they do, don't they?"

"What?"

"They think I should get over it now."

"No, no one thinks that."

"Then they think I'm weak."

"Apollo stop. Stop thinking about how we feel and worry about your own feelings."

"I don't want to." He dropped back to his side and tucked his feet up on the bed behind her. She continued to sit there. "Each day I get further away from him." He whispered. "The day after it happened, I kept thinking, just yesterday I saw him, I held him, I talked to him. Then the next day, it was just two days, then three. It was still close. But now it's almost been a week. Next thing it will be a month. Someday it will be years...years since I talked to him, since I saw him...I don't want that to happen. I don't want to slowly lose those memories to time. I don't want to keep getting farther and farther away from him."

She was left speechless by his words. Their profoundness touched her. Their sorrow silenced her.

* * *

He had drifted into sleep once more. Her fingers had played through his hair, until his mind had calmed and he had been able to rest. When he woke, she was gone, and his first instinct was to find her.

He'd left the dormitory for that purpose before realizing what he was doing. What had he intended by seeking her out in the dead of night? He wasn't sure, he blamed the desire on the grogginess of sleep. Still, her kindness, the silent comfort she'd given—he did need to thank her for that. But that was a conversation for the daylight, so he changed his direction, and found himself wandering back to the command, to those empty pods where the others sat.

He didn't know how to use the controls, how to take readings and give advice. He didn't know how to watch others fight, he only knew how to fight himself. It's how he'd lived, all his short life, fighting tooth and nail to survive and to protect.

"Apollo." He went rigid at the strong voice behind him. His fingers clenched where they had absently been running over one of the chairs—the one where Silvia normally sat.

"Don't. I don't want to hear your so called wisdom right now." He said their commander.

Gen Fudo moved behind him. Apollo never turned, but a hand came down on his shoulder.

"I was only going to say, I am sorry."

"...Oh."

"Apollo."

"What?"

"Why did you stay?"

"At DEAVA?"

"Yes."

"Because I promised Baron I'd save the others, the children we were protecting."

"And if you hadn't made that promise? If your friends were safe?"

"I said I didn't want riddles."

"It's no riddle, just a question, something to consider, deep in your heart. If those children were safe, would you have no other reason to stay here?"

"Why does it matter?"

"Because the answer might help you now, it might help you find strength you didn't know you had."

He shrugged out from under Fudo's hand. "You mean them, the others. That's what you're always trying to teach us—teamwork."

"And what is teamwork to you, Apollo? Is it not another word for friendship?"

The boy stilled. "I won't replace Baron with them."

"Who said anything about replacing? But you do have more than one friend, Apollo. And when you find your own strength is not enough to carry you through, then you must find strength elsewhere. Where better to look than you friends?" He moved out of the room. "Good night, Apollo."

He watched him leave and then turned back to the chair. "Silvia..."

* * *

He stood on her balcony, making no further move to enter the Alisia household. He had made his way here in the dark, but now doubted himself and leaned back on the rail with half a mind to run for the woods again. But the night loomed dark and long ahead of him, and for all the sleeping he'd done the past few days, he still felt exhausted.

He moved over to the doors and crept inside.

He followed her scent, went to the door, it was half open, he saw her sleeping. He stood, concealed in shadows, watching, but not entering.

No. He couldn't be here. What was he thinking? She would call him a creep and then Sirius would wake up and—

"Apollo?" He jolted at the whisper and took a step back, but she had seen him. He waited while she rose from her sheets, still fully dressed as if she'd just collapsed there after leaving him in his bed. "What are you doing here?" She whispered when she met him at the door.

"I..." He stared at her, blue eyes clear even in the dark. They watched one another until he could no longer hold her gaze. He couldn't explain why he'd come, he didn't even understand it himself.

"It's okay." She took his hand, drew him forward past the threshold and closed the door. They didn't speak, she led him to the bed and had him sit. He never looked up, eyes downcast but she sat behind him, closed her arms around him, and drew him down. They lay together in silence. She kept her arms around him, presser her head into his shoulder. He closed his eyes. He found rest.

* * *

"Silvia!"

The two started awake as one at the rapping on the door.

"Silvia, you're going to be late for classes!"

"I uh—I'm coming brother."

"Silvia, you sound strange, what's going on?" The door knob twisted. Her hand shot out and smacked Apollo with stunning force. He fell off the bed and flat on the floor just before the door burst open.

"BROTHER! I might not have been decent."

He looked her over. "You slept in your clothes?"

"Just get out!" She flew at him, trying to get him out but he eyed the rest of the room suspiciously.

"What are you hiding?"

"Nothing, Sirius." But he pushed past her.

"No, I sense something is off." He made his way into the room, inspected the bed and the floor but saw nothing.

"Satisfied?" Silvia snapped from the door. "Now do you mind? I want to get ready before class."

"Fine." He crossed back to the door. "But don't take long."

"Of course." He left and she slammed the door shut behind him. "ERG!" She let out an anamilistic noise. "That could have been bad." She stomped over to the bed where Apollo was crawling from under the bed and extricating himself from the sheets.

He was laughing.

"How can you think this is funny? Do you know what Sirius would have done if he'd found you?"

But he continued to roll on the ground, gasping as he tried to mute his sounds.

"Apollo!" She covered her mouth as soon as she screamed his name. He stilled. They waited to hear Sirius come storming in but only silence reigned. "He must have already left." She sighed. "And we should too—and stop laughing!"

He stood when she stormed out, his smirk slow to fade. Her hysterics always made him laugh, but after everything, he was surprised to find himself even able to. It felt good, it felt normal. And when she scowled at him when he caught up her on the walkway to class, he thought maybe things could feel normal again—maybe.

Classes went on, he drifted, maybe even fell asleep, he never paid attention anyway. He caught Silvia give him a look a few times, but he couldn't tell what she was thinking. That evening, he slumped onto the couch in the common room. Not long after, Pierre and Chloe joined him, then Jun and Tsugumi, then Rena, Silvia and Reika. The next thing he knew, the evening had disappeared to chatter and stories and bickering and gossip. When people started to leave for bed, Silvia looked to him again.

"Well," He stood up and stretched to answer her silent question, "I'm off, night everyone." There were only a few people left anyway, and he crept into the boys' dormitory, already dark, most people in bed.

He lay down and shut his eyes, holding onto the conversations, the laughter, the faces of his friends.

* * *

"Baron!" The sheets were off before he even woke up. Several other boys sat up sharply at his cry. His chest was heaving, sweat clung to him, but he sprung from the bed and out into the hallway even as he tried to catch his breath.

"Dammit." He cursed, moving down several corridors in case Pierre or one of the others decided to follow. He didn't want to see them, he was embarrassed. After a relatively normal day, he'd thought he could have slept through the night on his own.

He wandered the facility for over and hour before he saw her, face glowing under the moonlight that cast though high windows. He came to a stop, not sure what the ghostly girl might be doing up this late.

"It's alright." Rena said without turning to him. "I find it hard to sleep, so I like to feel the moonlight on me."

"Oh." He was on the landing above her but dropped lightly down to the floor next to her, bypassing the stairs.

"I thought you were Chloe at first, sometimes she comes to talk to me, when she can't sleep."

"Are you up late alot?"

"Most nights."

"Why? Do you have nightmares?"

"Sometimes. Is that why you're awake Apollo?"

"What?" He balked and blushed at the same time. "No, of course not, I'm just not tired."

"Oh. Well when I have nightmares, I like to talk to someone, so I forget the fear of the dream."

He wasn't stupid, but he also didn't have it in him to call her out on the ploy, so he sat next to her chair and said up to her, "You can talk to me if you want."

"Thank you, Apollo." She recounted a dream, of darkness and shadow, of feeling lost. He listened to her soft tones, let the moonlight seep deep into his bones.

"But mostly," she concluded, "in my dream, I am afraid of loneliness. Because deep down, I don't think the others like me very much. I think that I frighten them some."

"Frighten them?" Apollo scoffed. "There's nothing frightening about you, Rena."

"Thank you, Apollo. I'm not frightened of you either." He smiled at the strange compliment.

"Don't feel alone, Rena, everyone cares about you. Even if they don't show it all the time." She smiled now too.

"Yes, I think you're right. Will you walk me to my room? I think I feel like I could go to sleep now."

"Yeah, me too." He stood and moved with her down the halls. When he'd said goodnight and returned to his dorm he found everyone asleep again. When he lay down, he remembered her quiet smile, and it didn't take long to drift back to sleep.

* * *

_**Thank you Eien for the review! Next time there will be some action!**_

_**Riza**_


	3. Chapter 3

"Shadow Angel Attack! Elements users to the control room!"

"Vector Luna—Silvia."

"Vector Mars—Pierre."

"Vector Sol—Reika."

"WHAT?" Apollo skidded to a halt in the hallway. "Why didn't they call me?" He repeated his question when he burst into the command, "What the Hell?"

"Enough." The hand was against his chest before he even saw Gen Fudo.

"What's going on? Why didn't you call me? You don't think I'm up to it, do you? Well—"

"Remember what we discussed in this room two nights ago."

Apollo strained his brain to make a connection but the images of the three in their vectors distracted him. "Hey wait!"

"Apollo!"

"WHAT? Why are you stopping me?"

"Because you're not the only one who needs to learn to take strength from your friends."

"What are you talking about?"

"They need to be able to do this without you." Apollo glared at the trainer but relaxed enough that Fudo dropped his hand and let the boy go.

"I don't like this," he grunted and moved over to the rail where he could watch the screens more clearly.

"Not to question your methods," Sophia moved to the commander's side, "but it sounded like a pretty powerful harvest monster and cheribum. Are you sure you don't want Apollo on this one?"

"I'm sure."

"But why?"

"Because of the location."

She read the screen and made the connection. "You don't want him out of the barrier."

"No, I don't. The Shadow Angels needed Apollo to break the field protecting DEAVA. And when they came inside, the targeted him. This Toma—he wants Apollo on his side."

"But he tried to kill him."

"If he'd really tried, Apollo wouldn't be standing here now."

"So then...how do we keep him protected?"

"We can't, not forever, but his emotions lately have shown me he's not ready to face that now—and neither are we."

Explosions sounded on the monitors. They returned their attention there.

"Come on, dammit, pull yourselves together!" Apollo screamed, knuckles white on the rail.

"They're getting smashed to pieces!" Jerome cried.

"Let me step in for Reika!" Sirius stood. "She's not strong enough to lead them."

"SIT DOWN!" Gen Fudo brought an end to the clamour. "Have faith in your friends. We must not depend on one or two among us—but each of us must be ready and able to take the mantle of leadership when necessary."

Everyone grew silent. They watched the cheribum smash into Vector Mars.

"Why aren't they merging?" Apollo demanded.

"They're aura levels are all over the place." Tsugumi informed. "I think they're panicking."

"I have to go." But Apollo's wrist was caught in a vice grip. "Fudo, let me go!"

"Trust them."

"REIKIA!" They heard the cry on the monitor and Apollo ripped away but before he could launch himself over the bar her heard the call,

"Merge One!"

"Merge Two!"

"Go Aquarion!"

"...they did it." Sophia was next to him, hand over her heart as she watched them form, Reika in the lead. He let a sigh escape when the Cheribum was knocked down by a kick. The battle lasted only minutes after the merge, the harvest beast destroyed with the cheribum. The Vectors began their return. Apollo ran for the door.

"Where are you going?" Sophia called after him.

"To welcome them home." She was stilled by his smile when he looked back at her over his shoulder.

"That was quite a gamble." She whispered when Fudo moved beside her. "But I think it paid off."

"There is no gamble, when you truly have faith in your friends."

* * *

"Apollo." Sylvia dropped to the ground when her Vector was stationed. When she saw Pierre and Reika watching, she smiled wide at the young man. "Jealous we were able to beat it without you?"

His look of concern transformed into a scowl, and he turned his nose up, crossing his arms over his chest.

"What? No, of course not, I just wanted to make sure you didn't damage the vectors!"

"As if!" She shoved past him, "I need a shower."

Pierre burst into laughter and clapped a hand on Apollo's shoulder. "You really know how to win a woman's heart."

"What? I'm not trying to win anyone's heart." But he walked back down the hall with him, not noticing the faint smile on Reika's face at their back.

"Come on," Pierre continued. "I think a fight like that deserves some good grub, let's find something to eat!"

* * *

"Nice fighting out there today, Reika." Apollo had woken again, no matter how much better he felt in the daytime, the night brought out the pain of his heart. She was in the yard, the moon waning now, but still strong.

"Apollo, thanks."

"Having trouble sleeping?"

"No, I just like to sit out here and think sometimes."

"About what?"

"Everything. Reincarnation, past lives—all of it."

"Hmm. Do you really believe in all of that?" He leaned back against a statue in the yard, hands behind his head as he stared up at the mat of stars.

"What do you mean? Of course I do."

"I thought you were one of the skeptics."

"How can I be, now that we've found you?"

"Me?" He dropped his eyes again and pushed off from the statue. "No. I'm not Solar Wing."

"_What?"_

He just shrugged. "I don't really care about that. I'm not Apollonius—just Apollo—the name Baron gave to me. And you proved it today. You won without me. You don't need me."

"Apollo, you're not thinking about leaving are you?"

"No. Because you guys are my friends."

His honesty struck her, but he didn't seem to notice. He was very different from the feral child that came here some weeks earlier.

"But Baron was too," he continued. "And that has nothing to do with 12 000 years ago. I loved him like a brother—no, he was my brother. That's not because of reincarnation—that's because of what he did in this time—in the short time he had in this world. He taught me to love, to be loyal to your friends. So I'm staying because of him, because of what he taught me and the promise I made. Not because of prophecies or old stories, and certainly not because I think I'm Solar Wing."

"Apollo..." She watched him in the moonlight. "You can be pretty deep sometimes, you know?"

He smirked. "Nah, I'm just being logical." He stretched. "And now I'm tired. See you later, Reika."

"Later..." she watched him go but didn't move inside to follow. "Does he really not believe he's Apollonius?"

* * *

_What is this? _Anger dripped from the silent words of the shadow angel. Toma's fists clenched tight as he watched the image of the boy. _He denies who he is? Who's soul he carries! Insolent child! _

_Master , _Otoha warned. _Calm yourself._

_No. I cannot. If he denies his true form, we will never get the power we need for the Tree of Life. He has let his love of another wingless one make him forget who he really is._

_You're not going to earth again, are you? I will project you._

_No, this I must do in body and soul. Prepare the cheribum, I must descent—I must make Apollonius remember who he is._

* * *

**_Short chapter but big things next time when Toma attacks! Thanks for your review Art-is-a-bang-yeah. I will update soon!_**

**_Riza_**


	4. Chapter 4

Apollo had his hand on the door to the dormitory when the alarms sounded. Suddenly the silent night was swarming with bodies, all the element users stumbling from sleep to action. He met Reika again, the only two fully dressed. Pierre caught up to them in his black tank and shorts. They met Silvia in the control room, in her nightshirt but pulling her hair up into two loops. Somehow Sirius still looked as composed as ever.

"Who's piloting?" Pierre asked.

Gen Fudo looked upon them. Tsugumi was calling out warnings at the console. "Energy readings are through the roof—just beyond the barrier—must be—A SHADOW ANGEL!"

"I'm going!" Apollo headed for the vector shoot.

"NO!" Fudo stopped him. "Reika, Sirius, Pierre! GO!"

"Yes sir!"

"WHAT?" Apollo screamed but a kick sent him to the ground.

"Commander!" Silvia dropped to Apollo's side while he coughed harshly. He sat up, fury in his eyes.

"You don't trust me after all. You bastard, you know I can help them. This isn't about trust anymore this is about survival."

"You're right Apollo, and it's your survival that concerns me."

"What?"

"That Shadow Angel, has undoubtedly come for you."

"Then let me at him!"

"No. To let you leave now, would be as good as sending you to your death—or worse, and I will not do that."

"It's my decision to make."

"No." Silvia stood. "The Commander is right. Toma nearly strangled you last time, there was nothing you or any of us could do."

"And what do you think he's going to do to them?" Apollo countered, rising.

"He's not obsessed with them, maybe he'll let them go."

"_Maybe,_ Silvia? You're brother's out there! Are you really willing to take that risk?"

"I...I believe in them, and so should you." She turned her back on him. He growled and looked back to their commander.

"I don't appreciate being lied to, old man." He stormed from the command but stopped short in the hall beyond when he met Rena on her way in. She was shaking. "Rena, what is it?"

"It's so close—so close to the barrier. I can feel him, his rage, his anger, and—"

They both heard the cries from inside command. Apollo ran back in to find the images on the screen blurred by white light, screams, then—

"Reika!" Her form slumped back into the chair.

"I'll take her place." Silvia ran forward.

"No, wait!" Apollo wasn't quick enough. Silvia dissolved before him and reappeared on screen. "SILVIA!"

"I can do this." He wasn't sure if she'd heard him over the com, or if she was just telling herself but he watched her face set as she gave the cry.

"Merge form Luna!"

"She's taking control..." Sophia murmured.

"She can handle it," Apollo spat. "They all can."

_No they can't._ The hollow voice was just next to him. He spun but saw nothing. _It's you I want. Come to me, Apollonius or watch them all die, one by one._

"Brother!" Her scream made him turn back to the monitors. A moment later, Sirius slumped into his chair.

"I'm going!" Apollo ran for the railing.

"NO!"

"You don't understand!" Apollo shouted at the man who tried to restrain him. "He'll kill them just to get to me. You have to let me go! You have to let me stop him!"

"And what if you can't?"

"At least my friends might survive." He shoved away. Jun was already running to take Sirius's place but he stopped when Apollo landed before him. "I have to do this."

He jumped in the pod. Next thing he was in Vector Sol, hands clenched tight over the controls.

"Apollo!" Silvia cried. "But the Commander said—"

"Enough. Both of you, go back!" he ordered her and Pierre.

"What? We have to merge."

"No. It's too dangerous. I can't risk...I can't risk losing anyone again." With that he shoved the thrusters forward and left them behind.

"Pierre, we can't let him go it alone."

"I know." They pushed their vectors to catch up with him.

"I said stay away!" Apollo cried over the com.

"No!" Silvia affirmed. "We're not abandoning you."

"We were with you that day..." Pierre continued. "It was the three of us who broke that barrier, who faced Toma first, we should be with you again."

"But I—"

"You're not the only one who would risk their life for a friend. Merge one!" "Pierre..."

"Merge two!"

"Silvia.."

"Apollo let us help you."

He set his jaw but nodded. "Alright. Merge three. Go Aquarion!"

The pleasure and pain of the merge made them all shudder even as that overwhelming light faded. Silvia and Pierre could feel the pounding of Apollo's heart, his rage and his fear.

"Calm down." The older male warned. "We've got your back, Apollo."

"I know." But he couldn't relax as they came even with the cherubim. He knew what lay with in it.

"Come on, we can do this," Silvia encouraged.

"Right." He drew back his fist, their power joining with his to give maximum strength. They struck.

The fist was caught.

_You are nothing but a human when you do not call on your true soul._

The face seemed right before him, Apollo strained to retract his hand as he stared in the pale visage of the angel.

"I am Apollo! That's all that matters."

He gave a yank and broke free, but only because the other let go.

_You are wrong._

The strike came far too fast for him to see, to counter. They fell flat—just like last time, back smashed into solid rock.

"Get up!" Pierre warned.

"I know." But the next attack came before they could rise—it came straight at the part of Aquarion that was Vector Sol.

"Apollo!" Pierre and Silvia screamed as one as strike after strike bore down on that one spot.

"Argh!" The boy was caught in the onslaught, both power and physical strikes immobilizing him.

"Silvia." Pierre screamed over the monitor. "It's up to us!"

"Right!"

A foot came up and swept at the cherubim at the same time that Silvia brought down an arm. Both were stopped. Apollo blinked his eyes open just in time to see Toma smile.

Then he ripped the limps away.

"NO!"

Silvia and Pierre cried out, they were still in the main body of the mecha with him but when the next strike came they shattered—Aquarion fell apart. Vectors damaged, Pierre and Silvia crashed to earth.

"Pierre! Silvia!" _Your concern is not with them! _He lost sight of Luna and Mars when the face was right before him. _Face me, wingless child!_

And with that Toma threw Vector Sol to the ground.

"Apollo!" Tsugumi cried from her console, shifting the information from the three vectors back and forth over her screen to read all their vitals. Pierre and Silvia were motionless on their screens, their life signs read unconscious. But for Apollo—"He has no life signs!"

"It can't be," Chloe breathed.

"It isn't," Gen Fudo spoke above them. "There are no life signs detected, because he is no longer in his vector."

"There he is!" Jun had been shifting through the images projected from the exterior of the vectors. Between them, he managed to bring up an image of a form on the ground.

"He's not moving."

"Yes he is, look." Jun zoomed further. They could see him clearly now, as if they were just a few feet from him. Blood trickled from his nose, his hair line, and sweat poured from him as he dragged himself along in the churned dirt. One hand was reaching back, trying to hold a wound.

"His leg is broken." Tsugumi concluded when looking at another camera and, from this angle, seeing clearly the way the limb stuck out in a painful direction. "Oh no! The Shadow Angel."

"That's it." Jun stood. "We have to do something."

"But the vectors are down!" Tsugumi argued.

"We don't need vectors. Our friends are just beyond the barrier. We have to go help them! We can't just sit here and do nothing."

She clenched her fists. "You're right. I'm coming with you."

Chloe and Kurt rose as well. When they reached the doors, they parted.

"Reika!" She was drained of all colour and a bad bruise marked her face but her features were set. "I'm going with you."

Their resolve was unbreakable—the last hope of DEAVA ran to save their friends.

* * *

_**One more chapter, thanks for your reviews!**_

_**Riza**_


	5. Chapter 5

_Crawling on the ground like an animal—you pathetic wingless one. You think you can face me without the power of Solar Wing?_

The form floated just above the ground before him. Apollo raised his head to look at him. "I'm not Solar Wing. I'm Apollo!"

_You're a pathetic wretch. _One of those floating feet came down on his back, hard, crushing the air from him and pinning him face down in the dirt. _You don't deserve to draw breath._

"Then why are you wasting your time talking to me?"

_Because I want the soul inside of you._

A hand took hold of his shirt, forced it off of him.

"What are you doing? Get off of me!" But a cold hand between his shoulder blades stilled him. He felt the chill of the touch pierce through him to his chest, his heart.

_Do you remember your wings? Do you remember the pain of losing them?_

"Ahh!" Cold fingers effortlessly ripped open his skin, deep into the tissue. Apollo convulsed beneath him, fingers still dug into his shoulders. "You bastard..."

_Remember! _Toma's fingers ripped away with a cruel twist. Apollo gagged on the pain and choked on a scream, hot blood pooled up and out of the matching wounds, coursing over his shoulders and back.

"Remember!" This shout was real, was a scream to his very soul. The land around rippled in the shock wave.

Apollo screamed when he was rolled over, his broken leg sending electric pain through his body. Toma's fingers clenched around his bare shoulders, Apollo was caught between the agony of his leg and back, and the frightening chill of this being—of his proximity to him.

"Remember your love for me, Apollonius."

"NO!" He shoved away and with the motion came a red wash of light and power.

He succeeded in pulling free of the creature's hold, but the force threw him back into the ground and he writhed at the pressure on his open wounds. He was losing strength too quickly. His head was to the side, he saw the vectors, Pierre and Silvia must be hurt if they weren't out here with him. Just beyond that, the barrier glowed. He couldn't see DEAVA from here but he imagined it, imagined the others watching helplessly on their screens. Had that old man Fudo been right? Was this going to be his end, laying on his back in the mud?

_It is your love for another that makes you forget me._

Hands pushed his wrists deeper into the dirt. Thorny vines wrapped over them, bit deep and held tight. He was crucified to the earth, naked and vulnerable under this evil.

_So I will make you forget him._

A hand was in his hair, gripped tight to his skull, the other found his chest—his heart.

"...no...Baron..."

_Forget him!_

"NO!" But he had no choice. Power ripped through him, tore from his skull to his heart, from flesh to his very soul. His mind and memories were invaded. He saw the ashes in his palm, the scarf in the wind, the scream in his mind, the ache in his heart—

"Stop!" The voice was weak but the conviction strong. "Toma stop."

Hands lifted from him. Apollo gasped where he lay in the dirt but his head had fallen so that he saw her. "...Sil..via."

"Stop!" She was staggering, hand held out before her. "I won't let you do this to him."

_Have you not learned your lesson? You cannot stop me._

Vines sprung up, she leaped back. No matter, they caught her anyway and dragged her down.

"Let her go!" Pierre kept one arm tucked against his body, but he held a weapon—a gun from his vector. "And get off of him!"

He gave no more warning and shot. Toma simply held up a hand as the ball of energy slowed before him. Pierre prepared to fire again but Toma drew back his hand and the shot was returned.

"PIERRE!" Silvia cried when he barely dodged and was thrown several feet in the explosion. He raised his head, still conscious, but he wasn't getting up again soon.

"No..." Apollo groaned from beneath his captor. "NO!"

_Yes._ Toma smiled when the glow of power covered the boy's body, when hazel eyes turned red. _There you are Apollonius. Do not let this child deny you. Do not be contained by a worthless human!_

But the light faded, Apollo returned to himself and smiled up at Toma. "No," he whispered again. "If he's who you want, I won't let you have him."

Angelic eyes narrowed in rage. _You will suffer._

"Apollo!" Silvia screamed when Toma's hand clenched over his throat, when his feathers flared wide and his eyes became dark points of light.

_I will make you forget them all, and know only me._

And he dove down on the boy. He forced his lips over his, held him against him with a hand over the wounds on his back. Apollo's arms were pulled tight where they were restrained and blood opened up along his wrists. Everything in Apollo fought it—not just the revulsion of the physical touch, the forceful kiss, but what was being done to his mind, his spirit. He felt in all those touches Toma stealing from him his very soul—who he was—Apollo. He was erasing what made him the feral boy, the loyal friend, the DEAVA soldier.

Silvia watched a silver tear escape his eye, fall down his cheek. She choked on sobs and cries, her own tears drenching the earth.

"Apollo! No! APOLLO!" "Enough!"

Sivia's cries were cut short. She turned in her restraints to see them—their friends. Toma withdrew, still holding Apollo tight. The boy's head fell back limp, though his eyes remained open.

"Release him."

"G-gen Fudo...came himself?" Silvia stammered. The element users filed in at his back from the armoured truck they'd taken to get here.

"Silvia." Tsugumi ran to her side, at once working to cut the vines. Reika raced past them to reach Pierre.

Toma's eye remained fixed on the Commander.

_Your soul...I recognize it._

His hands lifted from Apollo, the boy fell in the dirt, the jolt bringing him around enough to see the others. His vision swam, and worse, his mind was a jumble of painful memories. But his eyes settled on Silvia still struggling out from the thorny vines that held her in place.

Toma stretched out his hand to the group.

"...don't." No one but Toma heard Apollo, his voice no more than a breath. "...I can't...I can't lose them..."

_But you will._

The ground churned under their feet. Vines were the least of their concern when the ground split into chasms wide enough to consume them.

_Be consumed by the world you are bound to, wingless ones. Die._

"Silvia!" Tsugumi's hands locked over her wrists when a crack opened up beneath the blond. She clung back, Tsugumi's hold all that kept her from falling.

"NO!" Jun skidded over the earth to help them. Behind them, Rekia and Pierre were stranded on a dangerous precipice, Chloe and Kurt were clinging to the end of chasm that threatened to devour them.

"DEAVA SOLDIERS!" Gen Fudo cried over the noise of splitting earth. "Do not let yourselves be divided! Only together, you are strong!"

"But..." Tsugumi cried out as Silvia slipped. "Hold on!"

"I'm trying."

"FIGHT TOGETHER!" Fudo cried again.

"How?" Chloe begged.

"We can't reach one another!" Reika screamed.

"Yes you can! You a team, you are—Aquarion!"

"Aquarion..." Pierre stumbled in Reika's grip as the ground continued to shake around them, but they were closest to the vectors. He faced them. "Aquarion...is us," he repeated.

"Us..." Reika watched him, then turned to the others, last of all to Apollo on the ground beneath the enemy. "Apollo...Silvia...everyone...EVERYONE!" she screamed now. "Merge one!"

"Merge two," Pierre cried.

"What...? What are they doing?"

"He said we have to fight together," Jun said to Tsugumi as he held Silvia's other hand. "And together we are Aquarion. Merge three!"

"Right. Merge four!" Tsugumi cried.

"Merge four...?" Silvia stared up at them. "Then...Merge five!"

"Merge six!" Kurt shouted.

"Merge Seven," came Chloe.

A swell of energy was building in the air. "I feel dizzy..." Tsugumi felt the pressure in her chest, her hands slipped on Silvia's wrist.

"Don't let go!" Jun cried but her hand slid free, Silvia began to fall.

"Silvia!" A strong hand caught her, she came to a halt and looked up into the pale face of her brother. "MERGE EIGHT!" Sirius turned back over his shoulder, waiting for his cry to pierce the boy on the ground. "APOLLO!"

Hazed eyes watched them, felt them, heard them, and just before Toma realized what was happening, just as his hands returned to Apollo's throat and tried to cut off his voice, he whispered.

"Go...Aquarion!"

The cold touch vanished, replaced by burning light. It came from him, it came from the very ground, from the vectors, and his friends.

"NO!" Toma's voice rocked them but could not break them. He flew back from the radiating child, from the force of them all together, and into the protection of his cherubim.

"Auqarion." Tsugumi looked up, the vectors rising by themselves, shaking from the ground and reforging themselves. "Let's go." Jun had her arm, they ran at the vectors. Reika eased Pierre to the earth.

"Go," he encouraged her when she hesitated. "Send that bastard back to the sky."

"We will!"

The three ascended, but everyone was in this fight, every voice who had cried was now bound to that body of steel, every heart and mind was in the fist that attacked, in the kicks and strikes.

_Master Toma, please come back._

_Just wait. _The shadow angel answered the disembodied plea. He fended off the attacks, but his eyes were ever on the boy below, struggling to sit, his blood fanned out behind him at his back but more—in the glow of this power, in the haze of yellow light—golden wings flared from his broken body, eyes burned red and hotter than the sun.

_There he is. _Toma smiled. _You have not forgotten who you are after all, Solar Wing. My work is done."_

His cherubim leaped back from another attack. The sky parted in those black and stain glassed holes.

"He's getting away!" Reika cried.

"Let him." The voice of the Commander reached her. "We must take care of our own now."

"Right." Aquarion backed off and the sky sealed shut once more.

On the ground, everyone was assessing the damage.

"Apollo..." Silvia looked to him from where her brother supported her, but Fudo was already at his side.

Everyone was still, watching the Commander carefully lift the boy from the dirt, though not all the way, his leg could not be moved. But he held his naked shoulders, kept his hand against the wounds in his back.

"You're friends are with you Apollo. Take their strength, if you are not strong enough on your own."

Apollo's eyes focused on the Commander for one moment before they shut and he went still.

* * *

"Mmm...I'm back here?" Hazel eyes parted to the sterile room again. He shifted but stopped, pain lancing through his shoulders.

"I wouldn't move much," Sophia warned him. He saw only the hem of her white coat from where he lay, waiting to suss out the rest of his condition before moving too much again.

"How bad is it?"

"The wounds in your back were very deep, but we managed to stitch you up, there shouldn't be any permanent damage. You will, however, have to stay on bed rest for a few days."

"Days?" At this he tried shifting again, to test the verity of her statement. This was when he noticed the weight on one leg. "Ah, what is that?"

"A cast." She stopped him from yanking back the sheets. "You broke your leg, remember?"

"Oh...right." He was sitting, pain throbbed through his back but he didn't feel that now.

"Apollo?" But he had drifted, eyes going vacant as he remembered what had happened. Flashes of pain and fear went through him, but everything stopped on one moment. His fingers raised to his lips before dropping back to his lap.

"Apollo, are you alright?" she asked when he came back. He looked at her but dropped his eyes at once.

"I'm fine."

"There isn't much point lying to me."

"I...don't want to talk about it."

He sunk back onto the bed, laying on his side so there was no pressure on his back.

"Some of the others have been asking to see you. Is that alright with you?"

"...yeah, okay."

"Good." She smiled warmly and replaced his medical chart at the end of the bed. "I'll let them know."

The door opened shortly after she left.

"She said only two at a time." Silvia explained when she stepped in with Pierre. Her arm was in a sling; he was only wearing his tank, bandages bound up one arm and poked out from under his shirt.

"You're injured." Apollo's eyes were on Silvia's arm but he shook himself and looked back to Pierre too.

"We're fine," he assured. "It's you who almost bled out back there."

"I did?"

"Yeah, Sophia didn't say?"

"...no." Apollo struggled up again so he could face them more evenly. Silvia carefully sat on the edge of his bed while Pierre stood at her back. "Thank you...both of you, for going with me."

"Of course." Silvia said softly.

"You went through Hell back there, kid." Pierre tried to keep his voice light, but it was impossible with the weight of what happened. "Are you okay?"

"I don't know," Apollo admitted. "He was...trying to take my memories."

"Did he?" "Well I remember who you are, don't I?"

"I guess so," Silvia smiled, but looked to Pierre. "But, Apollo...do you remember Baron?"

He understood their unease. "Yeah, I do."

"Oh good," she sighed, "So Toma failed."

"No, he didn't." Apollo's gaze cast sideways, a faint blush spread over his face, one that made his voice crack and eyes water. Her hand fell over his. He started and withdrew.

"I'm sorry," she whispered.

"No, I'm sorry." He tentatively put his hand back on the sheets. She took it in her own. "I am Apollonius' reincarnation, aren't I?"

Silvia bit her lip. It was a question that plagued her all the time, but Pierre was the one who answered. "I think it's a safe bet at this point."

"Then Toma won. I tried to tell him I'm just me, I'm just Apollo. That's why he wanted me to forget Baron, and all of you—so I would only remember my past life...so I would only remember him..."

He brought his hands up to his face even though it hurt his back to move them that much.

"I couldn't stop him." His voice shook behind his bandaged hands and wrists. "I was...terrified."

The pair waited. They couldn't erase that image from their mind, Apollo chained to the earth beneath that creature, his lips on his...

"But you saved me." He brought his hands down again and looked to them. "I thought I was alone but...you came." His eyes rested straight ahead, on her, "I heard you calling."

"I couldn't do anything either," she answered. "It was everyone—everyone came together to help us, to help you."

"I know they did. They risked their lives for me."

"You've been risking your life for us since the day you came here," Pierre interjected. "Of course any of us would do the same."

This seemed to bring peace to the boy, a gentle smile took over the raw pain in him.

"Thank you."

"Of course. Now get better, in case you need to save our asses again!" Pierre gave a wave and headed for the door. "I'll tell the others you're too tired to talk to them right now." He gave a wink a the pair of them before either could protest.

"_Pierre!_" Silvia's face turned red. When she heard a chuckle from Apollo she whirled on him. "Don't laugh! Think about the rumours he's going to start by leaving us in here alone."

"Let him," Apollo sighed, and lay down slowly. "I don't care," he said a bit more softly.

"Apollo, you must be in alot of pain."

"I'll be okay."

"And what about the pain inside? Do you want to talk about what Toma did?"

"About how he kissed me? No, not really. It was awful and it makes me feel sick thinking about it, there, end of story."

"Apollo..." He let out a long breath and shut his eyes. "Besides, after everything else it doesn't seem important."

"Of course it's important, Apollo...a kiss should be a gift, something special between two people who care about one another—it shouldn't be forced on you—it shouldn't be taken from you."

His eyes scrunched further shut, one of his hands shifted to cover is face.

"Apollo..." fingers brushed through his hair at his temples, pushing it back. When he felt her lips on his forehead, his eyes opened again. "So much has happened to you the last few days." She withdrew, he watched her in silence, still feeling the imprint of her lips on his skin. "I just want you to be better."

He sat up again, not even wincing this time, eyes locked on her. He held out his hand. She slid hers in his and let him draw her gently forward.

It was brief, barely a moment their lips were pressed together, but then he leaned his forehead into hers and she held him back for several long seconds.

"Thank you," he whispered when he withdrew. "I will be okay," he said with renewed confidence. "So don't worry about me."

She caught the familiar, arrogant smile and cocked her chin skyward. "Of course I won't worry, silly."

But there was no doubt of her true feelings, and she smiled a little more softly just before she left.

Apollo sank back yet again, this time very aware of the twinge of pain, but it was only external now. In his heart, something had lifted. And he shut his eyes, at peace, because he knew no matter what, he was loved, he was not alone.

And not because he was Solar Wing, but because he was Apollo.

* * *

_**Woops, didn't mean to leave this hanging for a couple weeks, anyway, voila la conclusion! I hope you liked it, it was just an idea that popped into my head and I thought it would make for a good short fic. Thanks for the reviews.**_

_**Riza**_


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